As parents we often tend to over do for our children. We fix their plates, we pick out their clothes, we cut up the meats, we pick out the socks. Which are all good and helpful things to do for toddlers. It only becomes a problem when we allow it to be carried over into the older years.
It is not a question of can they do it. It is more of a Why they choose not to do it for them selves.
My daughter often gives me grief in the morning to find her socks or a shirt. It could be laying right beside her but yet she has to have me come find it for her.
To get her used to being independent and getting her own clothes ready for school. We made it part of our night... more
Ok get ready for this. I am going to play devil's advocate. Sometimes when you adopt, you have no idea of what you are getting yourself into.
We have all heard some horrible adoption stories - where other children have been harmed by the adoptive child, how the child set fires, killed animals and tortured them, so on and so forth.
Like I said back in one of my own past posts, I think my middle daughter could be a poster child for why child abuse should be legal. Or why abortion is a good alternative to child birth. (giggle) Sad as it may seem there are children who act like they have been spawned by the devil himself.
So what if Ricky was this type of child? What... more
As you may have already heard. Michigan will be trying the Adoptive Parents of Ricky Holland for his murder. Other charges may follow such as child abuse.
Wow......If murder does not qualify as child abuse what does?
It has taken them this long just to decide that there is enough evidence to try them. Somehow I think this time allocation was un-necessary.
I wonder how many calls to protective services were made on this family prior to Ricky's death, if any at all.
I wonder if Ricky's teachers or friends noticed anything strange about Ricky or any bruises prior to his death?
I sit and wonder what a child could do to anger an adult so much that the... more
While walking in the zoo one day, I took note of how many signs they had posted that said, "Don't Feed The Animals." I thought how silly that was. What harm could it do to toss a peanut to a cute elephant or monkey?
So ok, yes I did it. I tossed some of my popcorn over the fence to the monkeys. It was fun too. Everyone was doing it. I didn't think that the monkey could be harmed by some popcorn.
Just about that moment here came a zoo attendant. He asked everyone to stop feeding the animals. A few of us asked why? What harm can it do?
The zoo attendant told us that if the popcorn gets caught in the monkeys digestive system it can cause the monkey to die. He went... more
Have you ever tried to teach a lazy kid how to do chores? Well I can tell you it is not easy. The child can be taught over and over and for some odd reason, they always say, "I don't know how to do that," when you tell them you need something done.
I have made chore chart after chore chart. Posted them everywhere. Complete with a "How To Do ..." list.
After asking several times and going over what needed to be done and, still not getting anywhere, I would usually do it myself.
What I figured out was that not only were the kids lazy but very smart. They caught on to my handicap parenting. After I stopped and looked around at them sitting while I was working,... more
As many of you know, I am in the balance of trying to raise my 16 year old daughter. Most of the time I amaze myself at how well I handle her and the situations that arise. However, man did I mess up this time. Last night my daughter and her friend were out visiting friends. She missed her curfew. So by 10:30 P.M. my husband, little daughter, and I decided to drive around and check out a few place where she might be.
We have had a lot of nights lately where my daughter has run away and stayed gone for a week or more until we or the police found her.
Exactly one week ago she got in to trouble and we had to go pick her up at the local hospital at 3 in the morning. She received... more
It was one of those lazy Saturdays and no one seemed to be alive yet around the house. We had gone and picked up Billy from the boy's home he had been placed in.
Billy is one of our children's biological brothers. He did not want to be adopted and still expressed very strong ties to his birth parents. He was about nine when we first met him.
We often went and picked him up for holidays and special weekends when he got out on a pass for good behavior.
After all the kids woke up and had some breakfast, the boys wanted to go to the school and play basketball. I told them to pick up around the yard first and then they were allowed to go to the school to play. As they... more
As parents we spend time nurturing our children. We do everything we can to keep them safe, warm and happy. When they cry it breaks our heart too.
We just get used to doing everything we can for them. So when they begin getting older and learning to make their own choices. Sometimes we have a hard time letting them do it on their own.
We monitor where they are. Who they are with. We even have a parental alarm that kicks in when they are choosing friends.
Sometimes we just love them to much to trust them to make the right choices. This is when we tend to over parent. We have to learn to balance and allow our kids to make mistakes. We learn the best lessons... more
My daughter and I were talking one minute and the next she is raising her voice and telling me her opinion. I asked her twice to lower her voice and stop yelling at me.
In our house hold we do not use the "S" word. We never tell each other to "Shut UP". We have always tried to be civil and keep our voice down to a loud roar.
Here I was in the middle of cooking dinner and having this intense conversation with my daughter about "Why" she should not hang out with a few of her so called friends. She begins yelling her opinion and before I knew it. I did it. I lost it. I raised my voice and I said those words.
My daughter was so impressed with me that I had... more