At one time in our family’s endless journey towards normalcy, I had five or so kids on behavior contracts at school. Teachers willingly checked off some simple accomplishments like: 1) homework turned in, 2) not disruptive today in class, 3) had school supplies etc.

It served to keep the kids accountable and to help me see what needed to be worked on here at home. Nowadays we have Power School which I love. Within a few quick... more

I’m asked, “What’s my secret?” or “How on earth do you do this?” in regards to simply getting up each day and facing the problems, the challenges, and the fun involved in a large family, but I touched a chord yesterday resulting in some long, tormented comments.

Y’all I get it, I know this hurts, and I know this is impossibly difficult, sometimes dangerous and head-poundingly frustrating. Please know that I rail against the... more

I start each day with a large handful of carefully selected vitamins that I take after breakfast and I absolutely hate doing it. I hate swallowing pills; hate the slight smell and the time it takes. But so what? Life’s not about doing what one always wants to do; sometimes we have to do what is necessary.

My kids resist doing most things on a good day. I have to teach them about simple responsibilities, accountability and doing what needs to be done.

They hate homework, don’t want to work all day in school and then come home to more... more

I meet people who tell me they’d love to have a large family which reminds me of a George Eliott quote,

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.”

Our local high school principal told me today he’s the baby of 11 children, raised in rural Kentucky, taught right by his eight older sisters. This explanation goes a long way towards explaining just how and why he can still tell me that ornery old Big Joe, one of my older sons,... more

It’s not lost on me that some people might be overwhelmed by the needs and demands of parenting 39 children. I have, not for a minute, ever regretted this choice in my life. I have railed loudly over the damage done to my darlings before I adopted them, I have been massively frustrated by their obstinacy and defiance, and I have cried buckets of tears at times when I’ve watched them make horrible decisions,

I don’t mind the non-stop work, although yesterday afternoon I had a little foot stomping, voice raising mini-explosion over a six foot high pile of clean laundry that no one... more

Yesterday I church-ladied everyone and railed against alcohol. Fortunately for folks like me in the South, which must be capitalized, we can invent verbs such as the one in the first sentence, as often that’s what fits best, and we’re known for being characters anyway.

My bandwagon apparently slid through Los Angeles as Paris Hilton, not usually known for siding with middle-aged, overly opinionated stuffy Southern broads, chimed in with her “Don’t... more

If there is one thing I constantly try to over-do, it is in the area of encouragement to children once living in utter discouragement.

The first time, in 1991, that I met one of my darling daughters was in her foster mother’s house in Texas, at the 6th birthday of her baby brother. She, then age 11, ran to her room to show me the A that she’d earned on a fifth grade report she’d written about Russia. I complimented her; of course, encouraged to be adopting a grade-grubber,... more

One of the biggest battles in our home involves consequences. A local teacher in our area, lowered a kid’s grade for sleeping in class, a consequence I’d certainly approve of, but the teacher was not backed by the principal, a conflict ensued, a law was enacted and the teacher changed schools.

I spent 25 years in the public school system and learned about many, many parents who would back up their chronically misbehaving... more

Living just a few counties away from where this metro Atlanta survey was taken has made my stomach roil. Good Grief am I a total old fuddy duddy? I’m appalled and I grew up during the very permissive, rebellious 1960s.

These teens are having multiple, risky sexual encounters and doing drugs in middle school. Is it a stretch for me to mention that the same county, also struggling with population growth, can’t recruit or keep enough foster... more

I title many of my posts with the words “older adopted children” because that’s what I write about constantly. When other parents of older adopted children google search terms, they are more likely to find this blog if I do so.

I apologize openly to all my children for using the A word here so much. At home, in our real life I don’t use it. I don’t say, “This is my birth child,” or introduce anyone as my adopted child. These are all my children, my real children and I love them all. More importantly, they know, or are still learning that I love them.

Adoption is the same as birth in the eyes of the law, and in my eyes and we share the same last name,... more