“I have learned that people are a lot like cement. You find cement or concrete in two forms: soft or hard. You can shape the soft cement with a spatula if you get to it early. If you wait too long, you'll need a jackhammer to change it.”
I have so many heroes, authors as mentors and other people that I look to for answers. Tim Elmore is one and he wrote the above words. This is not necessarily very good news in the world of adopting older children. I’d find it discouraging if I hadn’t already seen such success with my other children.
Realistically I am not necessarily out to change my children; I like... more
Am I this annoying in real life? This pompous and over-bearing? Probably more so, just ask my kids. I was accused yesterday of bugging the crap out of one of them, but also he can never say that I gave up on him, because I know that I never will do so. He just doesn’t realize it yet.
I’m so much a part of the nerd herd that I was listening to a podcast this morning while I worked outside in the garden, reaching into my grubby pocket for the index card I keep there, and I was taking muddy notes about what I was listening to at the moment.... more
“Getting a good education and making good grades no longer ensures success, and nobody seems to have noticed, except our children.”
This is from the book I'm reading, Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert T. Kiyosaki.
Our children have noticed Madonna, Michael Jordan or Bill Gates and Oprah become wealthy without studying hard like we told them to do. For me, as a formerly devoted grade grubber, this comes like a smelly horse pill to swallow, but our world has changed.
It’s not so much so that the lack of schooling helped these role models (to our children); I believe that our children are failing to see the deep drive and determination... more
I harp a lot about money around here. I have to do so as usually what I’ve said ballooned through my kid’s minds and out their ears. If you spend more than you make you will be in trouble. If you have a minimum wage job you cannot qualify for a 2008 car loan. Simple things that I feel I was born knowing when in reality my parents taught me daily; something my kids obviously lacked.
I’d picked this book up Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert T. Kiyosaki, I’d watched him on a CNBC show, The Millionaire Inside, one night and I was transfixed.... more
So for my first day alone in my life, although my parents live in an attached house to us and I have two unemployed grown sons living with me, I planned a busy day after spending an initial hour at the schools putting out emotional fires and wiping tears.
I came home to utter silence that is monumental when one has 39 children. It is never quiet here.
I cleaned up for awhile and a friend dropped by. She’s a Probation Officer in the next county and made her point to one of my sons that I’d been fussing at for over an hour. He quickly replied, “Yes M’am,” and went out the door, while I just could not get through to my other son who has lost quite a few jobs since leaving the... more
And along with our back to school preparations I literally have to factor in the time sucked up by anxious, upset, apprehensive and fretful children who are always highly suspicious of, and resistant to, change. We’ve recently had two broken windows punched out in their wild-eyed fear that was manifested by anger. Kids are picking at each other until someone bursts into tears over nothing and I have to settle everything.
Yes, everyone needs structure and routine and the school provides it well.
I have eight boys out on the back deck... more
My one birth child, almost 34 years old, looks at the world very differently now for two reasons. The main reason is that she’s expecting her second child late next month but also the past 20 years of either living in or around our family gives one an interesting perspective on parenting and child raising.
The other 38 children all came to me due to a lack of parenting from different caretakers, and the fall-out from such has been tremendous. While it is often easy to step back and comprehend why my children act this way, it is never so simple... more
I just signed up 14 of my children for fall soccer. Our county puts siblings on the same teams in their respective age groups so I only have four teams going at one time plus a daughter at cheerleader practice. My older grown kids still living with me have jobs and classes, they aren’t able to help me much anymore with transportation and ballgames.
Between the games and the practices, plus our many therapy appointments, the after school schedule is tight. I’m finding tutoring help as well, we’ve cleaned the house top to bottom, school starts... more
Still on my leadership discourse, Lou Gerstner expounds “There’s a human side that leaders have to have; a sense of humor, intelligence, creativity, ethical standards and integrity. Rules for leadership are the same in business as in personal life. Be consistent, fair and firm.”
And I’m learning that even more important is for us parents to pass this down to our children. And judging from this picture, I have a big job ahead of me. Hey, they're just really creative kids.
I’m... more
Fearing that it sounds too egotistical to keep referring to myself as a leader, my explanation involves the fact that I’m merely trying to land this moniker on all of us mothers who are struggling with our children and their unique sets of circumstances.
I have heroes and mentors that I quote often but that’s because I read them often, attempting to pump myself back up after each round here. Lee Iacocca describes leaders as “taking their knocks, learning and moving forward; not just survivors but fighters.”
He... more