Just because we seemed to have a really bad day yesterday, just because everyone came unglued, including the one who is supposed to be the role model, doesn’t mean life as we know it, is over.

I could have just sent everyone to their rooms after supper, or been a retaliatory brat after the resentment expended yesterday. I could have thrown up my hands and walked away, but one thing stopped me.

Mr. Non-Verbal, the one who may have Asperger’s Syndrome, he certainly has something, the one who uncharacteristically changed into clean clothes... more

The smartest one, he’s in the Gifted class, proud of his geek reputation, knowing how much I appreciate signs of intelligent life in our house, the one who within an hour caused two younger siblings to join his raging-over-nothing fest this morning, was also the first one to finally get a grip and apologize with tears in his eyes. This is unusual.

But I also raged. I stomped my feet, yelled and hollered something to the effect of showing my hillbilly roots, “I’ll be DOGGED if I’m gonna get another tumor from the ugliness pooped out on me around here!”

No,... more

I started another post, a nice one, but I got interrupted 72 times by two raging-over-nothing children, and now I am very angry.

I probably shouldn’t even blog, while in this black mood, but this is the reality in the adoption of older children.

It is barely eight in the morning on Spring Break, and the smartest one just went down in a fury because it wasn’t his turn to get on the computer. How does that translate into a right to tear up someone’s house? To hit walls, kick furniture, and lash out at the only person who has ever properly... more

I’ve been a vegetarian for more than 30 years, before that I rarely ate meat at all. Giving it up was easy because I don’t like it; I think meat has a nasty taste.

I’m raising my children as vegetarians, but not forbidding them to eat meat, they can eat it at school if they want, or at someone’s house, but not here. I’m committed to raising them to know that nutritionally sound veggie meals are easy and healthy.

They’re so glad to have a mother that cooks for them, that makes them sit down at dinner each night, that what I serve is... more

April was not the child we had sent away for "rehabilitation" as the judge called it. She could not make the five color levels needed to leave the program and come home.

Ladoga was 800 miles away from our home. So we could not participate as often in her treatment. We drove down on weekend twice a month but no mental expert works on weekends in these places. One however was on call.

Our bills began piling up. Before we knew it we had over 20,000 in lodging and medical charges and the program was not helping out daughter.

I had to write our senator and other representatives and a 28 page letter to the court before April was allowed to return home.

April was... more

New "landmark" research finds that alcohol and tobacco are more dangerous than some illegal drugs like marijuana or Ecstasy and should be classified as such in legal systems, according to a new British study.

I personally despise alcohol, feeling that it has contributed no good to anyone ever. Period. Most crimes are committed when the criminals are under the influence of... more

Lauri blogged today that hate is not a family value. I agree, of course, and will expound on that thought, substituting the word “blame.” Blame is not a family value, but, in adoption, it’s fairly common. And you, the adoptive parent, will be the one who is blamed.

You’ll be blamed by the school system, the mental health professionals (initially), by your family members and, most of all, by the child or children that you adopt…as in someone has to take the fall.

I’ve learned, overheard, or been told that it’s my fault a daughter is in a psychiatric facility, my fault that... more

Eight years ago four kids joined our family and all were heavily medicated. One was severely behaviorally challenged, bi-polar, on Depacote, Risperdol and several other medications, he ended up leaving us a couple of years later and residing in a state mental hospital, returning again only to end up in jail. After being on medications for over a decade, we slowly weaned him; his behavior was no better and no worse off medications, if anything he’d grown immune to them.

His three siblings, then ages almost 3, 4 and 8 were all on Clonidine because... more

How does one teach 39 children to be good money managers? By example.

Have I succeeded 100%? Nope. But it wasn’t for a lack of trying. I literally had one daughter tell me, this is a college educated daughter, “Mom, I want to make my own mistakes.”

Huh? How about, “I want to make my own decisions?” That’d be a better choice of words.

I feel that I have a massive responsibility to my children to demonstrate good money management, to provide for them, and to help them pay for college. That may mean I spend an exorbitant... more

I may sound, to some people, as if I live in a fairy tale wonderland, in that I stress we have the best school system, I go to the most wonderful church, and our county is simply awesome. But this is how I feel. If I did not think all was wonderful, then I’d move somewhere else.

Others, driving through our county, might wonder what in the world do we do for entertainment? There are no movie theaters, only a couple of restaurants, and no malls. The next county over has all that, and I don’t have free time anyway. We have ball fields, soccer... more