The twin dishwashers on either side of our industrial kitchen sink are exhausted, they’ve run about four times each day all summer as we’ve had very large numbers of people in and out of our house, eating constantly and filling up with water. Both dishwashers are literally breathless, I caught one G.E. Triton looking at the clock, calculating how many more hours until the kids went back to school. And yes, that’s my youngest daughter swimming in the sink,... more

My one birth child, almost 34 years old, looks at the world very differently now for two reasons. The main reason is that she’s expecting her second child late next month but also the past 20 years of either living in or around our family gives one an interesting perspective on parenting and child raising.

The other 38 children all came to me due to a lack of parenting from different caretakers, and the fall-out from such has been tremendous. While it is often easy to step back and comprehend why my children act this way, it is never so simple... more

I just signed up 14 of my children for fall soccer. Our county puts siblings on the same teams in their respective age groups so I only have four teams going at one time plus a daughter at cheerleader practice. My older grown kids still living with me have jobs and classes, they aren’t able to help me much anymore with transportation and ballgames.

Between the games and the practices, plus our many therapy appointments, the after school schedule is tight. I’m finding tutoring help as well, we’ve cleaned the house top to bottom, school starts... more

Still on my leadership discourse, Lou Gerstner expounds “There’s a human side that leaders have to have; a sense of humor, intelligence, creativity, ethical standards and integrity. Rules for leadership are the same in business as in personal life. Be consistent, fair and firm.”

And I’m learning that even more important is for us parents to pass this down to our children. And judging from this picture, I have a big job ahead of me. Hey, they're just really creative kids.

I’m... more

Fearing that it sounds too egotistical to keep referring to myself as a leader, my explanation involves the fact that I’m merely trying to land this moniker on all of us mothers who are struggling with our children and their unique sets of circumstances.

I have heroes and mentors that I quote often but that’s because I read them often, attempting to pump myself back up after each round here. Lee Iacocca describes leaders as “taking their knocks, learning and moving forward; not just survivors but fighters.”

He... more

Clearly I know very little about raising traumatized children. I am flying by the seat of my pants with my 39 kids. It isn’t easy, there are no instruction manuals, and I need a lot of outside help.

I’m not afraid either to fail or to make mistakes. It takes an ability to do both. It takes my own willingness to discard my great ideas that didn’t work and to move on to those that do. Or to just continue trying to discover those that do.

I’ll meet tomorrow with a new psychiatrist that has joined the psychologists group that I’ve been using for... more

“What do I do? It seems like that instead of being appreciated for taking on kids no one wants, I get looked down on like I'm at fault for doing the best I can with no help. I'm happy to be his mom, to stick with him no matter what, to be supportive, hold him accountable, whatever it takes, but I don't know what to do with him now, not even while I'm looking for help. If you, or some of the other adoptive parents out there, who have been there and done this, have got some advice or suggestions…”

I often receive emails from acutely distressed parents... more

Continued From Here I walked away from the blowout that would continue with or without me, and I held my crying 11 year old son for 30 minutes until he calmed down. He let me hug him, progress from a porcupine. I’ve spent so many years tending to the destructive, raging kids who may or may not ever improve, that I feel guilty about the good kids losing out on the needed, deserved attention. I went straight to him, the one who gets good grades and is trying so hard to learn... more

Six of my elementary school age children were just blessed by a week at a Math Camp. The guidance counselor put it on and invited my kids, undaunted by our inability to pay. We have applied for a local grant yet have not heard a yea or a nay from them.

While these six faced Math Camp and slung accusations of ‘nerd’ at each other, four other children got to go to an Outdoor Adventure Camp with horseback riding, whitewater rafting, kayaking and camping. The biggest dissenter is pictured here. The envy from one group to another was very pronounced at... more

Sometimes I can hardly sleep at night due to my advanced age of 53 and the long laundry list permeating my mind of issues and challenges that do ping pong way worse in the minds of my children. I think I’m struggling? Try being any one of my children.

My 21 year old son’s issues have been detailed in his driver’s license shenanigans, he is driving a 20 year old truck, found a job the first day he looked because he wisely chose not to return home until he’d accomplished his mission, fights with himself every single day to manage his earnings,... more