Nancy verbally struggled with a lack of integrity in many of the children we adopt and in the world as a whole in her post while Sandra pointed out a horrible story in India that is a microcosm of a much bigger problem. I’d also bemoaned my own small attempts to make the world a better place while I looked around me at all that was not being done.

As usual, when I’m working in my gardens, I get clarity, a peace of mind that often escapes me when I’m reading depressing newspapers on-line or dealing with my own children’s... more

It’s not lost on me that some people might be overwhelmed by the needs and demands of parenting 39 children. I have, not for a minute, ever regretted this choice in my life. I have railed loudly over the damage done to my darlings before I adopted them, I have been massively frustrated by their obstinacy and defiance, and I have cried buckets of tears at times when I’ve watched them make horrible decisions,

I don’t mind the non-stop work, although yesterday afternoon I had a little foot stomping, voice raising mini-explosion over a six foot high pile of clean laundry that no one... more

Yesterday I church-ladied everyone and railed against alcohol. Fortunately for folks like me in the South, which must be capitalized, we can invent verbs such as the one in the first sentence, as often that’s what fits best, and we’re known for being characters anyway.

My bandwagon apparently slid through Los Angeles as Paris Hilton, not usually known for siding with middle-aged, overly opinionated stuffy Southern broads, chimed in with her “Don’t... more

If there is one thing I constantly try to over-do, it is in the area of encouragement to children once living in utter discouragement.

The first time, in 1991, that I met one of my darling daughters was in her foster mother’s house in Texas, at the 6th birthday of her baby brother. She, then age 11, ran to her room to show me the A that she’d earned on a fifth grade report she’d written about Russia. I complimented her; of course, encouraged to be adopting a grade-grubber,... more

Being a middle-aged, Southern, church-going, conservative mother, one would expect me to be a teetotaler, to look upon alcohol with disdain, and that’d be a correct assumption. I don’t care if that makes me un-cool. Virginia posted about alcohol problems yesterday and I, as usual, have more to say.

I could rail against FAE and FAS for hours but I believe there are many bloggers who cover this in excellent... more

One of the biggest battles in our home involves consequences. A local teacher in our area, lowered a kid’s grade for sleeping in class, a consequence I’d certainly approve of, but the teacher was not backed by the principal, a conflict ensued, a law was enacted and the teacher changed schools.

I spent 25 years in the public school system and learned about many, many parents who would back up their chronically misbehaving... more

Living just a few counties away from where this metro Atlanta survey was taken has made my stomach roil. Good Grief am I a total old fuddy duddy? I’m appalled and I grew up during the very permissive, rebellious 1960s.

These teens are having multiple, risky sexual encounters and doing drugs in middle school. Is it a stretch for me to mention that the same county, also struggling with population growth, can’t recruit or keep enough foster... more

Nancy Grace, pregnant with twins at 48, is giving hope to career women all over the country, but making me very grateful to have it behind me now. My 25 year career in the public school system and my motherhood adventure of adding 39 children to our family has put me in a place where I’m now very happy and quite satisfied, while also planning new challenges and looking at many wonderful options as I turn 53 soon.

When I was the age of Nancy Grace, just 5 years ago, my oldest... more

I’ve written a good bit about the successes of my older children after many years of problems and challenges and I sure don’t mean to imply that all is well eventually. I am still shocked and saddened, feeling like I’ve done a poor job of parenting, taking it all too personally when one of them, in their twenties, still acts as if they don’t have good sense, still making poor choices.

Poor choices: A polite phrase for some of the most ill-conceived ideas I’ve ever seen, did none of y’all listen either in school or in church when basic morals were taught? If you do this, then that will occur. Every action has a result or a consequence, what were you thinking? Did you not learn... more

I title many of my posts with the words “older adopted children” because that’s what I write about constantly. When other parents of older adopted children google search terms, they are more likely to find this blog if I do so.

I apologize openly to all my children for using the A word here so much. At home, in our real life I don’t use it. I don’t say, “This is my birth child,” or introduce anyone as my adopted child. These are all my children, my real children and I love them all. More importantly, they know, or are still learning that I love them.

Adoption is the same as birth in the eyes of the law, and in my eyes and we share the same last name,... more