It was 7:30 am on Wednesday September 27, 2006. It was time to deliver our Grandson Jayden. I went by the place my son had been living and picked him up to take him to the hospital.

I gave him my camera and told him to take lots of pictures for us. Angela was sick and I had kept her home from school. So there was no choice for me but to think of the new baby and be sad that I could not be there for his birth.

My son has not been one of my favorite people lately.
I have been trying to help the girl who was pregnant with Jayden get ready for his arrival. I bought her a diaper bag, diaper wipes, blankets, receiving blankets and a bassinet. While the other grandmother bought diapers and a few other things.

While we were rushing around getting ready to welcome baby Jayden. My son was out living the high life. Getting drunk and high and having a good old time. Deserting every idea of parenthood with more drama and acting as if he had no cares in life.

During this time we also found out that the birth mom was drinking and smoking and using drugs too. Or shall I say someone made the aqusations of this to the local DHS. With an open investigation going on.
My son finally decides he will go back with his girlfriend and be a father to his son and her other two children.

My husband and I can only dream that our son will straighten his life out and be a good father to this little baby boy.

Knowing that drug testing will be done on all the children and the birth mom. We offered to take custody of Jayden if the grandmother will take custody of the other child. Just so none of the kids end up out in Foster Care. We also offered to work with the child's mother to help her get on her feet and to get her life on track so that she can get her babies back. If in fact that is her desire.

All of this made me think about the birth mothers who go in and have their babies. Then allow someone else to adopt them. Never to know where the child is or what they will look like as they grow up. It must be heart wrenching. I can not comprehend what a choice that would be for someone who has carried that little baby and been part of it's life for nine months. Only to sign a paper and watch someone else take that precious little life home.

I know many girls do this every day. Making the difficult choice to bless others to be parents. So that their child has an opportunity to have a better life.

But the sorrow of giving up a child has to be overwhelming. It goes beyond human love. It would be something I would think only god could console the soul and make the pain go away.

So my hearts go out to birth moms who are making difficult choices so that their child can live a good life. I look at my grandson Jayden and I see how messed up things can get...and how little children are born into sad situations.

I would do anything if he had wonderful parents to love and take care of him. Who had a focus on their own life and could give him a solid and safe home.
However this is not the case. One thing I do know is God never makes mistakes. I know we do every day.
So I am great full for a healthy baby grandson.

I welcome Jayden into our life and we will do our best as grandparents to make sure he is safe and secure. I wish love could heal the world. For if it could. This world would be a healthy place to be.