For those of us who have adopted older children, bedtime can be the hardest part of daily life. This is especially true if the children you adopt have never had a set bedtime and never experienced being made to get up early.

In homes where children are seldom sent to school and parents stay up and party all night long, it becomes a normal routine for the kids to stay up all hours of the night and sleep most of the day.

You may also find that they might have experienced physical, emotional or sexual abuse during the night time also.

But for us unfortunate Foster or Adoptive Parents who have to turn the world around and teach the children good hygiene and good restful habits, it can be our worst nightmare.

While I was studying some of the on line articles on Older Children I ran across a post written by Susan M. Ward - http://olderchildadoption.com/. She has experienced bedtime problems with her adopted daughter, Hanna, first hand.

I really found myself relating to her when she said she broke down and cried on the phone to her mom and told her she just wanted Hanna to go to sleep so she could watch one T. V. show like ER.

She describes the behavior of Hanna very well. I could see myself sitting in her living room watching it all take place. Just like all three of my older children when I adopted them. They would run from room to room. Stuff the toilet and sink with tissue until they would not drain or flush. If I did not sit out in the hall and keep control over them. This behavior would go on until the early hours of the morning.

Which of course meant that we all were running on almost no sleep. Getting them up for school was another problem. Of course they wanted to sleep and were cranky and mean. They could not run on just a few hours of sleep.

You literally have to re-arrange the child's total life style. This is a time consuming job. It just does not happen over night.

Some things you can try to do to help the situation are:

1.) Use the Love and Logic Bedtime training. Which is setting a time that the child must go into his or her room. If they do not go to sleep they can play quietly. If they have trouble getting up the next morning then they go to bed one half hour earlier. Until they learn to be better prepared for school in the mornings.

2.) Make sure the children get plenty of good exercise during the early evenings.

3.) Set aside a time for reading right before bed time so that the child's eyes tire a little.

4.) If all else fails consult your therapist or physician and they may prescribe a mild sleeping agent for the child to take on school nights.

As the children get used to the new schedule and they feel more at home and safe. They will begin to change some of the negative behaviors. So Yes, it does get better. It just takes time.