“Andrew Riley faced 128 felony charges Tuesday that included theft, vandalism and intimidation, but he is no adult; he is a seventh grader.”

At 52 I’m hardly an old fuddy duddy, but I remain shocked and astonished at today’s youth. What is going on?

Is it because music, movies and TV seem to glorify crime? One is cool if one seemingly beats The Man? Is that it? Has popular culture sunk our society?

I feel as if I live on another planet anyway what with all my children and their issues. But my children have an explanation for their behavior. They were traumatized, they are struggling to comprehend normal behavior, living with a regular parent who dotes on them, and doing routine, conventional stuff.

I monitor and stifle the trash that goes in their heads. I don’t allow rap music, R rated movies, and most of the regular TV channels. We live fairly isolated, so I don’t have to deal with neighborhood bullies nor negative influences; my kids participate in rec league soccer, church and school activities and family events. If anything they are over-protected by me.

They don’t resist much either. Having come out of chaos and confusion, my rules and routines are soothing and reassuring to them.

Yet I have two children involved in the Juvenile Justice system because one RAD daughter steals anything and everything with zero regards to anyone, and the other child is an angry, violent young man. Both kids are this way through no fault of their own. They did not choose to be this way, nor were they negatively influenced by societal pressures.

My daughter’s birth mom was an inhalant abuser, my daughter’s brain is now very mis-wired, the abuse and criminal neglect she suffered was horrendous, and my son’s history of neglect, rejection, and abandonment fostered his antagonistic behaviors.

However, by me not enabling these behaviors, this mis-conduct can be explained, but not excused, by me seeking resources, help and counseling, I have been able to get both spiraling downward children into mental health programs.

We’d be sunk otherwise and if I could advise parents of one thing it would be Do Not Enable Your Children In Any Way, Shape or Form.

I've held them accountable for every crime, covering up nothing. As a result they’ve been able to receive excellent services that would not be available to them otherwise. It is imperative, in the world of older adopted children, that we parents use Medicaid to pay for therapy, that we search until we are exhausted, finding every single source of help that is obtainable.

Establish a paper trail, document behaviors, keep a file of school discipline reports, have a psychological evaluation done, use every single bit of testing from your school system that can be done on your child…you must find out his or her abilities, capabilities and or disabilities. Then find them help.

Any one of my problematic children seems to be full-time for me. I lay awake at night thinking about what to do, I call agencies, I rely on many counselors, and I search, hunt, and find what the children need.

I will not go down without a fight on their behalf.

Have I always succeeded? No way. This is difficult and fruitless at times, but I have found a great deal of assistance. I remain surprised at how much help is needed for traumatized children.