My recent high school graduate daughter has been taking classes to increase her entrance scores that she needs for a local college. She put in 110 percent effort on every single day off from work but she didn’t get it all done in time, she didn’t make her own self-imposed goal. Am I disappointed in her?

Not at all, rather I’m proud of her. I’ve taught my children that we all learn as much from failing as we do from winning. I failed at several personal goals this summer. I didn’t weed a bucket a day from the gardens, I didn’t exercise regularly, and I didn’t get the pantry repainted.

I did get a lot done but those were specific goals I’d set and not met. Oh well, it wasn’t for a lack of trying, stuff came up, life went on and I will reset my goals just as I’ve taught my daughter to do.

I believe that the important thing is to make goals. Laud oneself for accomplishments but don’t let setbacks hurl one into a depression. Life’s too short for that.

As a family we have set some measurable soccer goals for each game. At a scrimmage yesterday my U12 teams outdid themselves, impressing their coach and stunning the opposing team. I have six kids on this one team and their leadership and shouted encouragements set their team on fire.

I wanted to be wearing a shirt that said I was their mom so proud was I.

My daughter has shrugged off missing the deadline because she knows that she did her best. I’ve told her so as well. Now she has reset the deadline date in her mind, affixed a monetary goal to achieve at work in bolstering her savings account, plus she’s more self-confident for having been to all her tutoring sessions.

She’s 18 1/2, still living at home and illustrating what I’ve learned over the years in the adoption of older children. They usually are not independent by age 18. Sometimes that becomes the age in which they start to trust me, to believe that I’ll be there forever for them. I’ve seen some of our best triumphs after that age and conversely I’ve been shattered by some choices my kids have made in their young adult years.

My kids watch me set blogging, budgeting, gardening and household goals. Some I attain, some I don’t. It’s all about learning from them, resetting them, and always continuing forward.

This we can do as a family.