Sadly this is a second blog on this issue. San Antonio is reeling under the finger pointing and the fall-out; still children are dying and this is not limited to this one region in Texas. This is a worldwide problem.

Yesterday afternoon I sat by our nice pool with a raging 12 year old son who’s been adopted by me, along with his four birth siblings, for five years now. He calmed down fairly quickly for him, another crisis averted, yet I then sat and verbally unloaded with my daughter who has earned a Master’s Degree in Social Work plus a Baptism By Fire Degree as she was also adopted by me at age 11 along with her two birth brothers. A veteran herself of the foster care system, she is tragically over-prepared for our family’s challenges and issues.

She knew how angry I was over Jose’s raging, his inability to function normally; she knows his birth family’s history, and subsequently what I am up against each day with him.

All y’all know that I have 39 kids since I have to mention it fairly often to give a sense of perspective.

I’m in a much quieter place now where my youngest 17 kids, with the exception of Jose, are all fairly normal. Years ago, I would have adopted again at this point, but not anymore.

I have the resources to adopt again, I have empty beds and a successful track record but no part of me wants to face the problems and challenges again with new children. I work for Adopt America Network and obviously here as well. I am painfully aware of the need for adoptive moms like me who will take older children, who will adopt large sibling groups and stick by them through thick and thin, but I only want to do it now for my own 39 children. Hey, call me selfish, but this is how I now strongly feel.

I want to call attention to the millions of children who need parents, children in orphanages and children here in the United States foster care system. I want to use my own experiences to encourage others to go for it and to remain enmeshed and committed in it. I want to horrify people into action if that’s what it takes or to gently hold someone’s hand through their own family situations. This is not an easy road, but a rewarding one ultimately.