I’m a rock. I have to be a rock. My kids need for me to be a rock constantly.

They have never had anyone that they can count on to be consistent. If nothing else, I am a consistent rock.

I will always choose to follow God and therefore I can be counted on by them to do the right thing. They, my kids, know that I will do the right thing. They test me, certainly, but their knowledge runs deep, that I can be counted on.

We are right now neck deep in a family problem with an older, college educated daughter; a very bad situation has ensued. I have done what every kid figured I’d do, that I’d be unhappy with the situation, but that I’d love and support my daughter through it, not enable her in any way, but be there. A ‘hate the sin, love the sinner’moment.

They knew this is what I’d do. Because I am a rock.

Rock-headed, rock solid, dependable and committed to my family.

There’s going to be a great deal of fall-out from what happened, many natural consequences, there’s heartbreak and grief, crime and punishment. It is not pretty, it won’t just go away, and this must be dealt with.

I explained to her clearly what she’s going to need to do now to get through this. She knew what I’d say, there are no grey areas in mama’s world, there’s clear cut right and wrong

Adoption, parenting, loving and supporting does not end at age 18. It changes, but it doesn’t end. In many ways it is more demanding after they turn 18, when they seem unsure that you are still there for them.

Sometimes adopted kids sail through their adoptive homes displaying few, if any, issues, only to have the deeply hidden issues emerge in their late teen years or early adulthood.

We’ve had a disturbing day, finding out a son-in-law’s double life, another baby. We’ve done the math, how dare he? The emotionally injured spouse reacting violently, police involvement, this isn’t pretty.

I, of course, was called. My family knew what I’d do, how I’d react. Let’s tend to this situation; somehow we will all learn from this, we’ll soon put a more positive spin on it, but not right now. It is a very painful time, sadness all around.

I held the original child, a very confused 19 month old, all night long. He needs to know that I can be counted on.

Like layers on an onion, we’re discovering unseen issues, after twenty years of parenting her, another sister spilled the beans yesterday, let loose a long held secret, a story of abuse in their former lives before adoption.

A light bulb exploded over my head. My family knows how I will react, what I will now do because I am a very predictable rock.