One of the hardest things to do in today's society is to trust someone. It should then be no shock to anyone that older children who have been in the system do not know how to trust or depend on someone else to provide for them and their needs.

It takes time and structure for a child to learn to trust again. The good news is children adapt much faster than adults do. So it can be done.

In order to trust you first need to know what it is. In order to be trusted you must know what it is and be able to implement trust to another. The more you learn the better you understand the process.

"Trust... in another people has several meanings:

Trust means that you feel that the person is honest and will not lie, cheat or steal from you. It also means that you can count on the person to do as he or she promised and that the person is reliable. Finally, trust in a person means that you feel he or she can be counted on to do something important, will not shirk from duties, and will take personal pride in what he or she does."

This quote was used by Ron Kurtus in his teachings on "Trustworthy shows character." Being trustworthy is a very positive character trait.

Ron Kurtus goes on to say that "being considered untrustworthy" is to be caught lying or deceiving another person. This will reflect badly on you as a person and the reputation can spread quickly that you can not be counted on for accomplishing things.

When researching the word "trust" to find meaning, it is often used in specialized banking. This should tell us a lot. If you are trustworthy then the people you ask to place their trust in you should be able to "bank on it." To know it is a done deal. You will be there for them. You will not lie to them or deceive them in anyway.

As a parent, I always try to stress the art of using words wisely. Do not promise a child something you can not or may not be able to deliver.
Children have a remarkable way of holding you to your word. Start off small. Keep each promise. Talk daily about how not lying can help build trust in a family. Trust is the first step in establishing good character. Good character is the first step in becoming a success in school and in the world around you.

So be a good example to your children. Give them time and help them learn that they can depend on you to be there for them.