Comments on: Should You Change Your Child’s Name? http://older-child.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/should-you-change-your-child-s-name Addressing all the issues faced by those who adopt older children and support by others who have. Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:44:14 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: mommy717 http://older-child.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/should-you-change-your-child-s-name/comment-page-1#comment-73 mommy717 Fri, 07 Aug 2009 02:57:34 +0000 http://older-child.www.adoptionblogs.com/2009/07/13/should-you-change-your-child-s-name#comment-73 I was adopted when I was 16, along with my twin sister. I couldn't wait to change my last name...however I really wanted to change my first name, as did my sister. Mom and Dad said that we were too old to change them. So, we kept our first names much to our disappointment. I still rather wish we could have changed them, no matter how logical and practicul it was to keep them. I was adopted when I was 16, along with my twin sister. I couldn’t wait to change my last name…however I really wanted to change my first name, as did my sister. Mom and Dad said that we were too old to change them. So, we kept our first names much to our disappointment. I still rather wish we could have changed them, no matter how logical and practicul it was to keep them.

]]> By: rdaldous@yahoo.com http://older-child.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/should-you-change-your-child-s-name/comment-page-1#comment-72 rdaldous@yahoo.com Mon, 20 Jul 2009 09:37:27 +0000 http://older-child.www.adoptionblogs.com/2009/07/13/should-you-change-your-child-s-name#comment-72 I was adopted when I was nearly five. My name was changed. I was later told that I was asked if I wanted to change my name and that I said I did. I don't remember that, and I have resented the name change, although I was named after a much loved member of my adoptive family. I feel as though my identity has been stolen from me. The only reason my adoptive mom wanted to change my name was because she hated my original name and made sure I knew that in later years. I was very hurt by the name change in later years, especially when I heard my adoptive mom say she hated the original name. All my years of growing up with my adoptive family my adoptive mom tried to change me and let me know how much she hated the way I behaved. Before she died, she told me she kept trying to change me because she didn't want me to grow up and be embarrassed by my behavior. That's when I found out how much of an embarrassment I was to her. I never bonded with my adopted family. I think that if the parents bond with the chid and make sure the child knows how much it is loved then it is probably okay to change the name. Just make sure the child knows that the name change is based on a deep love for the child and not for a selfish reason on the part of the parents. And please don't ever tell the child that anything is done in the best interest of the child because more than likely the child's best interest probably has nothing to do with it!~Anne I was adopted when I was nearly five. My name was changed. I was later told that I was asked if I wanted to change my name and that I said I did. I don’t remember that, and I have resented the name change, although I was named after a much loved member of my adoptive family. I feel as though my identity has been stolen from me. The only reason my adoptive mom wanted to change my name was because she hated my original name and made sure I knew that in later years. I was very hurt by the name change in later years, especially when I heard my adoptive mom say she hated the original name. All my years of growing up with my adoptive family my adoptive mom tried to change me and let me know how much she hated the way I behaved. Before she died, she told me she kept trying to change me because she didn’t want me to grow up and be embarrassed by my behavior. That’s when I found out how much of an embarrassment I was to her. I never bonded with my adopted family. I think that if the parents bond with the chid and make sure the child knows how much it is loved then it is probably okay to change the name. Just make sure the child knows that the name change is based on a deep love for the child and not for a selfish reason on the part of the parents. And please don’t ever tell the child that anything is done in the best interest of the child because more than likely the child’s best interest probably has nothing to do with it!~Anne

]]> By: kahoiam http://older-child.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/should-you-change-your-child-s-name/comment-page-1#comment-71 kahoiam Fri, 17 Jul 2009 18:38:14 +0000 http://older-child.www.adoptionblogs.com/2009/07/13/should-you-change-your-child-s-name#comment-71 I would agree with you on older children, keeping the name is best so as not to confuse the child. When dealing with an infant, I feel it is very much up to the adoptive parent. While many times we have birth mothers working with adoptive moms and dads to choose a name, many times we don't and it is left entirely up to the adoptive parents. Rarely it goes the other way. I would agree with you on older children, keeping the name is best so as not to confuse the child. When dealing with an infant, I feel it is very much up to the adoptive parent. While many times we have birth mothers working with adoptive moms and dads to choose a name, many times we don’t and it is left entirely up to the adoptive parents. Rarely it goes the other way.

]]> By: christinegomez http://older-child.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/should-you-change-your-child-s-name/comment-page-1#comment-70 christinegomez Wed, 15 Jul 2009 10:23:48 +0000 http://older-child.www.adoptionblogs.com/2009/07/13/should-you-change-your-child-s-name#comment-70 I have to agree too that kids especially the older once should be given a choice to pick a name for themselves but having said that I am sure any parent would not name their child with a hilarious name, adoptive or not. <br /> <br /> You have done the right thing. <br /> <br /> I love your article and would love if you could share it with the bizymoms Mesa community. www.bizymoms.com/mesa/index.php<br /> community. <br /> I have to agree too that kids especially the older once should be given a choice to pick a name for themselves but having said that I am sure any parent would not name their child with a hilarious name, adoptive or not.

You have done the right thing.

I love your article and would love if you could share it with the bizymoms Mesa community. http://www.bizymoms.com/mesa/index.php
community.

]]> By: Robyn C http://older-child.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/should-you-change-your-child-s-name/comment-page-1#comment-69 Robyn C Tue, 14 Jul 2009 05:44:01 +0000 http://older-child.www.adoptionblogs.com/2009/07/13/should-you-change-your-child-s-name#comment-69 When it comes to older children, I tend to agree with you. If the kids are old enough to choose, then I'd give them the option to do so. Some kids might want a more American name, or a more or less original name. For toddlers and pre-schoolers, I'd likely keep the given name, adding a middle one of our choice, unless the given name was truly awful (like the family who named their child Adolph Hitler). Of course, there are a couple of names that I just hate, so I'm not sure how that would add to the mix. Still, a child's name is incredibly important. I can't believe some one said "Name it. Claim it." about a child! How awful! When it comes to older children, I tend to agree with you. If the kids are old enough to choose, then I’d give them the option to do so. Some kids might want a more American name, or a more or less original name. For toddlers and pre-schoolers, I’d likely keep the given name, adding a middle one of our choice, unless the given name was truly awful (like the family who named their child Adolph Hitler). Of course, there are a couple of names that I just hate, so I’m not sure how that would add to the mix. Still, a child’s name is incredibly important. I can’t believe some one said “Name it. Claim it.” about a child! How awful!

]]>