Making plans for summer family activities would seem like an easy plan for most families.

However in adoptive families it sometimes turns out to be more stress than fun. Most kids love to swim.
But for the few who are terrified of water. A day at the pool for the family can be full of "freak out" moments.

There is nothing like trying to get a child to put on a swim suit when they are screaming in horror at just the thought of water sports.

Here we are at a public wave pool and my friend and I are trying to keep our tribe of kids in the vicinity. As we are dealing with two new little ones who know that in no way shape or form will they allow themselves to go into the water.

Finally we just picked the kids up and carried them with us onto the pool side deck. We put swimmies on the other children and float rings. Tossed in a few beach balls and settled down on the side of the pool to watch the kids play.

My friends two newest foster children are afraid of almost everything. They cry and you can see the fear in their little faces. It is so sad.

We sat down and gave them a beach ball and rubbed some sun block on them. Trying to get them to calm down and just play a little there with us beside the pool.

We never want to make a child do anything they are not comfortable with. But when everyone is participating in a family activity. You want to be able to have them come along too. No one splashed them or even encouraged them to go near the water.

They finally calmed down and fell asleep on their towels. We covered them up and relaxed a little ourselves.

It makes you wonder what a child has gone through when they seem to be afraid of everything around them. I giggled and teased my friend about bath time. I am sure she will have her hands full with those two.

It does not help when you have people who have no clue looking at you like you are abusing a child.
Because the child is so scared and out of control.
You can't get them to calm down.

The outside world has no clue as to what the adoptive and foster families deal with. Every child is so different. The one thing they all need is consistency and stability. Good parents know this.

While providing what the new children need to feel safe and secure. It was also very important to provide the other kids with a fun day out. Finding the balance is the art of good parenting.